45POTUS? Everyone Just Calm Down

Everyone needs to just calm down.

Take a breath.

Take a step back.

No, I mean it, just stop and take a breath.

Having returned to supply teaching (and after 5 years of dealing with mainly first world problems) I have had to, not only recall, but use daily, my classroom management training.

My last job had allowed me to become soft.

Class control took a tiny percentage of my resources.

That’s why I could spend more time on creativity, but I digress.

Recently, the 45th President was displaying the attributes and behaviour of a certain type of pupil, so in response I have some advice to the US media.

The US Media, who, btw, are under attack – just a hop skip and a jump away from censorship and

love them or hate them,

whether or not you believe that they’re all just getting what they deserve,

anyone believing in the freedom of speech has the duty to protect them all,

even Fox News.

I watched the press conference last week and I saw an entire room full of teachers fail to control one disruptive pupil.

Admittedly, this particular character may not immediately appear to be a teenager

(with a big ego and tiny hands),

but deep down underneath all the insecurities

(and possible mental health issues?),

let’s just pretend for a moment that he is.

When I was a student, I chose the special needs module and I learned from a teaching assistant in an EBD school – Emotionally and behaviourally disturbed, no, it’s not me using those words, yes,  they actually called it that, but it was 20 odd years ago, so it’s ok, unclench…

This teaching assistant was ‘The Pupil Whisperer’, he could calm down a Tasmanian devil with a single word.

He told me his basic rules.

  1. Remain calm at all times

  2. Do not get dragged into an argument, there’s no point.

After years of dealing with different and challenging iterations of this archetypal pupil, I have added the following guidelines for interaction

  • Require simply yes and no answers, where possible

  • Establish the facts. i.e.

    • The constitution states XX, yes or no?

    • The definition of unconstitutional is XX, yes or no? etc.

  • Present (possible/probable/likely) consequences of current behaviour

  • Offer (suggest) choice of (desirable) future course of action.

So, dear media, instead of getting caught up in the behaviour, manage it and help the adolescent modify it.

Take this information, ignore it, use it, laugh at it, try it out,


I’m just putting it out there.


If you want to read my evaluation of my time teaching, you can find it here:


Stop it, Adele!

I watched the Grammys and I saw Adele not accepting that she is worthy of the  Album  Of The Year Grammy.

I don’t want to take anything away from Beyoncé, honestly I don’t. I, like many others, took myself off to my computer as soon as I heard the buzz about Lemonade. I sat and watched the entire thing


and wow, it was an amazing watch.

The videos were beautiful, the poetry was stunning and as a full body of work, it was a brilliant, well-told story. I can honestly say that apart from the questionable message, which I’ll get back to, it was outstanding. But, but, but…

I’m in my forties and what I’m looking for in an album is not something I can sit on my sofa and watch.

I want something I can dance around my kitchen to, while baking cakes and squealing at the top of my voice – which by the way because of the smoking, drinking and advanced years is not quite as high as it once was 🙂

And for this purpose, I’m afraid, Beyoncé’s Lemonade doesn’t quite cut it. The music is there, some of the songs are kitchen worthy, but there’s not enough to belt out, there’s not enough high notes to challenge the aforesaid dodgy vocal chords, not enough scope for dodgy dancing whilst flinging cake mix around. it’s too much style over substance, it’s designed to be watched and admired, not actually listened to while trying to cream together butter and sugar.

On the other hand, ‘Send My Love to Your New Lover’ is a perfect song to sling some eggs into a mixture to. ‘Hello’ is perfect for sifting and folding in flour and ‘When We Were Young’, if you ignore that she’s, what? 26 at most and therefore still very much young, is the most perfect song to stand there with a wooden spoon caterwauling as loud as you can, while remembering all those people you fancied at school

(Yes I thought about you Polski, what are you up to nowadays?)

Maybe I’m just not young enough to appreciate Beyoncé’s artistry, but it’s just not singy enough, sorry.

I did say I would get back to my reluctance to praise Lemonade because of its somewhat dodgy message. Now, I appreciate what she was trying to do, but in my humble opinion, perpetuating the myth that men are weak and can’t help cheating and if you really love them you’ll give them a second chance, because your love is an epic love and together you can work through it. Bullshit! That’s ridiculous and not something you should be spreading if you truly want to empower women.

I’d rather have Adele’s message of send my love to your new lover, treat her better!

So Adele, no matter how much you admire Beyoncé, you bloody deserved that award.

It’s not a Grammy, but my cakes and I thank you.